Disciplining children has been a taboo and touchy subject for the past decade or two. Our culture has become so concerned with what is classified as discipline and abuse. Discipline and punishment are completely different. This is such a foggy area and people really shy away from discussing it. Does spanking your children constitute physical abuse? If you don’t spank your children are you an easy parent without firm limits? If you child is hitting someone, does it send a wrong message to spank (hit) them for it? “You’re telling me not to hit, but your hitting me for hitting someone”
Growing up I was not spared a spanking for my wrong doings. Granted I was not spanked for every undesirable offense but I received my fair share of sore posteriors. I learned quickly that certain behaviors are not acceptable. My mother was involved and invested in the type of person I needed to become. I learned respect, patience and kindness. Those lessons were not learned out of fear though. I obviously did not want to be spanked, but the spanking was not the focus of me wanting to change my decisions or behaviors. It was the disappointment from my mother. I didn’t need to be medicated to “behave”, I didn’t need to be sent away because my mother feared what other would think of her for disciplining me. Simply put, she spanked me because she cared. As I got older, and larger the spankings decreased and my mother became more creative. Video games were taken away, game memory cards were deleted and my friends did not see me as much outside of school. As with everything in life, the way I was disciplined evolved.
Please don’t think that I am saying you have to spank your kids and there is no other way. Some parents don’t approve of it and thats fine. The point I’m trying to make is this; Don’t be afraid to discipline your children out of fear for what people would think of you. No one is raising your children for you and you have the right to teach, love and discipline them as you see fit. (Unless if falls into the realm of abuse, then thats no good) Do I spank my children? Yes. When my wife and I feel it is needed. Is it always a last resort? No. Our gauge on discipline has evolved to meet the need of the “offense”. There are other ways to get your message across to you kids outside of spanking, timeouts and groundings. I remember seeing a video titled “Dad of the year”, where the father took his daughters computer and shot it with his gun because she was being inappropriate on social media. Other sources of discipline are becoming popular. The below video is on of the newest trends of discipline:
Now you may not agree with this particular parents methods, but you can’t deny they are effective. There are different methods for different parents. Decide what kind of child you want to raise and mold your methods of discipline to meet those standards. Kids are durable and can handle a lot, except for a parent who doesn’t care enough to invest in them, and discipline is a very important part.